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The Exorcist 2: The Heretic

  • April 15, 2009 – 10:04 pm
  • Posted in Review
  • Tagged demons, linda blair, pazuzu, richard burton
  • Comments (0)

However bad you think The Exorcist 2: The Heretic might be, I can almost guarantee that you’re incorrect. The Exorcist 2, which brings in Oscar winning actors Louise Fletcher and Sir Richard Burton to flank the returning Linda Blair, is perhaps one of the worst sequels ever made. The degree to which the director staffs minor roles with Hollywood heavyweights (Max von Sydow, James Earl Jones, and the man who broke the unprotected gay sex barrier in Hollywood, Ned Beatty) is testament to the desperation he must have felt working with the world’s most boring horror script. Lots of heavy-handed dialogue between Burton (looking like Drunky McSweatsalot in every scene) representing faith and Fletcher (looking positvely Lincolnesque) representing science. Lots of lights being shined in Linda Blair’s face. Lots of Burton mumbling around the African desert. Not a lot of sense made.

“Don’t you ever want a woman, father?” “Yes.” Creepy.

2/5

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Grindhouseland Salutes… Linda Blair

  • April 14, 2009 – 2:30 am
  • Posted in Grindhouseland Salutes
  • Tagged child star, Grindhouseland Salutes, linda blair
  • Comments (0)

Deacon Blues is back with another salute to an artist that exploitation cinema fans adore and mainstream critics love to hate. This time, it’s the Undisputed Queen of the B’s, and Oregon resident, Miss Linda Blair.

Linda Blair grew up in Westport, CT and began modelling and acting at a very young age, mostly appearing in commercials (for things like Gulden’s Mustard) before her breakthrough role in The Exorcist. Miss Blair originally wanted to be a veternarian, but was lured by Hollywood by the promise of raising money to take classes in horsemanship.

For better or for worse, Linda Blair will always be known primarily for her role in the 1973 film adaptation of William Blatty’s supernatural horror novel The Exorcist. The film garnered Miss Blair a Golden Globe Award and a nomination for an Oscar. Her chances at the Oscar were memorably damaged by allegations that she did not do most of the acting on the voice track, and that she had a body double, something that both Blair and the director William Friedkin deny.

Linda Blair followed up her performance in The Exorcist with a string of bad girl roles in made-for-TV movies such as Born Innocent, where she is notoriously raped with a broom handle by a gang of feral teenage lesbians. Soon later she starred in The Exorcist II: The Heretic, a film which garnered Miss Blair a Saturn Award, was widely panned critically, and featured no heretics.

Then came arguably the second most defining event of Linda’s life after The Exorcist. In December of 1977 she was, in an event that would pre-figure the media’s infatuation with teenage stars gone bad, arrested for conspiracy to purchase cocaine and amphetamines. Her career never recovered, and the string of non-hits which followed is largely what her career has been remembered for, if anything, other than her Academy Award nominated turn in the original Exorcist film. Roller Boogie, Hell Night, and Chained Heat are three films which can be placed in what is arguably, for hardcore fans of Linda Blair such as Deacon Blues, her classic period. But audiences had lost interest in the chubby cheeked, sexually provocative girl next door. Savage Streets is perhaps one of the most overlooked genre gems and cultural artifacts of the 1980s. During this period she received three Golden Raspberry nominations (for Hell Night, Chained Heat, and Savage Streets, the last of which garnered her the coveted Razzie).

The latter half of the 1980s was even crueler to Linda than the first half. She was reduced to pure camp schlock such as Zapped Again! and the Leslie Nielson spoof Reposessed. Even a recent resurgence of interest and the growth of her stock as a cult figure have not paid off in meatier film roles. Deacon Blues for one can’t understand why Quentin Tarantino hasn’t cast her in any of his films yet… except maybe because he’s a total fucking dick.

Deacon Blues highly recommends Savage Streets, Born Innocent, and Roller Boogie as three of Linda’s films that belong in any serious afficionado of b-movies, exploitation cinema, and the popular culture of the 1980s. Mark my words- Linda Blair will come back harder than Vanilla Ice. In fact, I’m quite surprised that she hasn’t already. Look for the upcoming Rick James (whom Linda dated for many years and wrote the song “Cold Blooded” about her) biopic to kickstart things for her.

Roller Boogie

  • April 8, 2009 – 5:17 pm
  • Posted in Exploitation News, Review
  • Tagged linda blair, roller disco
  • Comments (1)

The Queens of the Bs, Linda Blair stars in Roller Boogie, a well-made, entertaining, and far less confusing than Xanadu (but what isn’t?). Bear with me if any of these plot elements sound familiar. He’s just a working class kid from the Jersey Shore. She’s an upper crust genius on the flute. Will they fall in love against all odds? Save the roller rink from mobsters? Win the Boogie Contest? I think you may know the answer to all of the above. Sadly, however, it lacks a “Hey guys! Let’s save the roller rink! Come on!” montage. Pitch perfect picture from the days when spandex clad quad roller skaters roamed the Earth.

4/5

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Hell Night

  • April 6, 2009 – 7:39 pm
  • Posted in Review
  • Tagged compass international, dead teenagers, haunted house, horror, linda blair, slasher
  • Comments (0)

The other product of my Evening With Linda Blair… Hell Night. Lady Linda was nominated for a Razzie award in this one, a post-Halloween slasher flick that’s definitely above average, but without a lot of surprises. Personally, I think that it’s basically the same movie as Night of the Demons, but not as good, and without Linnea Quigley. Then again, NotD doesn’t have Linda Blair. What a conundrum!

3/5

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Born Innocent

  • April 6, 2009 – 7:21 pm
  • Posted in Review
  • Tagged bad girls, linda blair, made for tv, women in prison
  • Comments (1)

It’s hard not to question the judgment of all parties who allowed 14 year old Linda Blair to star in the television movie Born Innocent. A touching morality tale about a teen runaway whose parents abandon her to The System. After getting raped with a broom handle by a gang of adolescent lesbian thugs, she runs away, and becomes as rancorous and riotous as the rest of the ladies. Again, not sure why her agent or her parents let her be in this one, but it doesn’t really matter. You just need to buy it. One of those “has to be seen to be believed” kinds of things.

4/5

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Chained Heat

  • February 12, 2009 – 6:49 am
  • Posted in Review
  • Tagged bad girls, john vernon, linda blair, sexploitation, women in prison
  • Comments (0)

Another Linda Blair epic. Chained Heat evokes the New World Pictures women in prison movies, while failing to live up to their level of technical expertise or fun. Linda plays the new fish at a women’s prison, learning the ropes, and finally leading a rebellion. The plot is mostly incidental to scenes of lesbian rape, prison fights, and men abusing women. Not without it’s moments but not nearly as good as one of the classics from the 70s. If you’re a Linda Blair fanboy it’s an extra special treat, but those less enamored of the pea soup spitting, cocaine snorting starlette can skip this one.

2/5

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_pdHi_PsDb4]

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Savage Streets

  • February 3, 2009 – 5:19 am
  • Posted in Review
  • Tagged bad girls, bloody, linda blair, linnea quigley, punks, revenge, shocksploitation, vigilante justice
  • Comments (1)

Savage Streets co-stars Linda Blair and Linnea Quigley. I don’t really understand why it’s necessary to say anything else, but I’ll do it anyway. Ms. Blair is hellbent on revenge after a gang of thugs rape her deaf-mute sister and then throw her friend off a bridge. This movie has it all- lots of tits, gratuitous violence and great dialogue. By all means, check this one out. It stands head and shoulders above your garden variety revenge picture and stars two of the leading lights of 1980s paracinema. I could watch this one once a week for the rest of my life and not get bored.

5/5

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RT9NGNh0HA4]

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