Skip navigation

June Preview

Howdy, y’all. I know it’s been quiet around here, but I’ve been reading books and what not instead of rotting my brain with tits and gore. Hard to believe, I know.

June is shaping up to be a great month for fans of paracinema. There are some real classics on the docket here in the City of Angels, as well as a great entry in the ongoing Portland Grindhouse Film Festival. We’re also always interested in reports from other cities and I wouldn’t be adverse to taking on some help around here to help me cover what’s going on in the world of paracinema across the nation. If you’re interested and can write (and if you have to ask yourself if you can, you can’t) contact me at nicholas [at] nicholaspell.com

Portland Grindhouse Film Festival

I haven’t forgotten where Grindhouseland started. For those of you living in the land of rain and bad service, Dan Halstead is dishing up Women’s Prison Massacre on the 14th at 7:30 p.m. at the usual spot, The Hollywood. A late entry into the women-in-prison idiom, WPM features a protagonist named Emanuelle, which I’m guessing means there will be more lesbianism than normal. Things get really spicy when four men on death row break in, leading to hijinx that I’m sure differ greatly from Porky’s.

1981's Shaolin and Wu Tang poster

Also in June at The Hollywood is what seems to be a sort of spin-off of Rose City’s GFF, Kung-Fu Theatre. On the 28th at 7:30, catch the epic classic Shaolin vs. Wu-Tang in glorious 35mm. Gordon Liu directs and Lau Kar Leung directs more chop-sockey action than you can shake a bo staff at. Come find out where all your favorite Wu-Tang Clan samples came from.

New Beverly Cinema

Here in Los Angeles, the New Beverly is dishing up some mouthwatering slices of grindhouse for discerning palates. This Saturday, June 4, check out the double feature of Blacula and Scream, Blacula, Scream. William Marshall plays an African prince transformed into a creature of the night. Check out this odd mix of horror and Blaxploitation on the big screen as part of the 3rd Annual Vampire-con Film Fest. Hang around for a midnight showing of Friday the 13th, Part II, the one where Jason Voorhees makes his debut in a fetching flour sack.

June 25 features a midnight showing of one of my personal favorite video game movies From Dusk ‘Til Dawn. A crime movie turns into an hour or so of constant vampire attacks featuring George Clooney, Quentin Tarantino, Harvey Keitel, Juliette Lewis, Cheech Marin, Tom Savini, Fred Williamson and Danny Trejo. An entertaining little film with a great soundtrack and sure way to impress a date.

The Grindhouse Film Fest stuff for June doesn’t seem to be on the site yet, so there’s probably more goodness to come.

Cover of the OST of Blacula

The Egyptian

One of the most impressive cinemas in all of Los Angeles, The Egyptian also does a good job of hosting fun movies of interest to paracinema fans. In June they’ve got a great lineup. On the 18th, check out a triple feature of Evil Dead, Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness, the trilogy that launched Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell into the hearts of all red-blooded Americans. The action starts at 7:30.

On the 24th head down to check out what is arguably John Carpenter’s finest moment, Big Trouble in Little China. For those who haven’t seen it ( and seriously, if you’re a male who has missed out on this I’m getting you a dress and a box of Kotex), the film seamlessly integrates Carpenter’s love of the supernatural, Westerns and comedy into a true masterpiece of genre cinema. The next day The Egyptian shows Henry, Portrait of a Serial Killer, a truly disturbing film that will be even more uncomfortable to watch in 35mm. Both films start at 7:30.

Off-topic, but awesome, The Egyptian’s sister cinema The Aero will be hosting They Shoot Horses, Don’t They? one of my favorite films of all time, featuring a smoking-hot Jane Fonda on the 22nd at 7:30 on a double bill with Harry In Your Pocket. The next night you can catch the original Cape Fear as part of a double feature with On Dangerous Ground.

The Hooked Generation / Impulse

I’m a little late on this write-up, but last Thursday I had the chance to go see The Hooked Generation and Impulse at the New Beverly Cinema. The films were part of the Grindhouse Film Fest series put on by Brian J. Quinn and Eric Caidin with an assist from Grindhouse Releasing.

The marquee poster for the Hooked Generation

The evening was a tribute to William Grefe who was in attendance that night to answer questions. This is par for the course at the New Bev who go out of their way to treat grindhouse as what it is — a legitimate, albeit completely fucked up, art form. Grefe, for his part, was wonderful, taking questions with aplomb and a sense of humor, telling great stories about “the biz” from the point of view of a small, independent Florida film maker during the golden age of exploitation cinema.

The first film, The Hooked Generation, wasn’t so hot. A tale of drug-addled thieves who boost a shipment of drugs from Cubans before things go horribly wrong, the film was slow paced, too long and not different enough from other films in the genre to warrant a lot of attention. I was a little afraid of what the second feature was going to be like after this one. The print was “a little pink” in the words of Mr. Quinn. Overall, the film wasn’t terrible, but it’s nothing that I would recommend or watch again. 2/5

William Shatner in his white suit in Impulse

Impulse, however, was a whole other matter. The film stars William “Big Shat” Shatner in what might be called his finest role, or at least his most Shatneresque. Shat plays a psychopathic killer who just can’t stop killing women after sucking his finger Dr. Evil style. Apparently he furnished his own wardrobe for this film and I want every stitch of it. I thought that Kingdom of the Spiders was over the top, but nothing can beat his trademark style in this film. Highly recommended, but sadly unavailable on DVD, so you might have a hard time finding this down at the local video store. 4/5

As per usual, the introductory trailer reel was put together by projectionist extraordinaire Adam Trash. I can’t think of many better ways to spend eight bucks in Los Angeles, so make sure that you add the Grindhouse Film Fest Facebook page to get alerts on what’s coming up.

H.O.T.S.

HOTS1

I watched this gem a while back. The film bills itself as containing lots of “well-endowed” women. Some of them had respectable amounts of tit, but my standards in this regard are different than most.

This movie is sort of like Animal House with women who are always losing their shirts to strange mishaps. There are lots of “ROBOT HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUSE!“-type moments. The ladies in question are a women’s club comprised of coeds too uncouth and poorly bred to get into the snobby sorority. They strike back by forming “H.O.T.S.” which apparently stands for “Help Out The Seals.” Whatever. The rivalry culminates in a game of strip football. Hey man, don’t look at me, I don’t write this shit. Overall it was a fun little movie, a good flick for a night when you want to have a laugh but also want there to be decent tit floating across the screen every few minutes. 3.5/5

Duke Mitchell Birthday Bonanza

Duke Mitchell's "Gone With The Pope" Movie Poster

I admit to being a new convert to the world of Duke Mitchell. Apparently he was a crooner in the 1950s, providing the Elvis-like voice of Fred Flintstone on the similarly named television show. Grindhouse Film Fest and New Beverly Cinema were kind enough to host his two directorial triumphs, Massacre Mafia Style (aka The Executioner aka Like Father, Like Son) and Gone With The Pope (aka Kiss the Ring).

Special guests included Duke’s son Jeffrey Mitchell and close friend / fellow director / creator of the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling, Matt Cimber. Sadly, the latter left before I could get a photo op. Though both had some great stories about Duke, especially Cimber who rattled off some very old school Italian northeast stuff.

Massacre Mafia Style was a swell picture with heavy moral overtones and lots of paint-red blood. The son of a Sicilian mafia patron returns to the states to take over. Not everything, mind you — just the bookies and the pimps. Lots of casual anti-black racism with long soliloquies about anti-Italian prejudice. The film, with apologies to Grindhouse Film Fest honcho Brian J. Quinn, did what makes grindhouse such a lovable art form: It went seamlessly from awful to sublime to fucking bizarre in the span of a few minutes. Definitely worth leaving home for. 4.5/5

The Executioner VHS Box Front Cover

Gone With The Pope followed, and was this ever an exploitation masterpiece. First of all, you haven’t lived until you’ve seen Duke Mitchell’s outfits. But beyond that, there’s the epic heist plot: A team of three friends, steeled together in prison, kidnap El Papa and hold him for the ransom of one dollar from every Catholic in the world. The highlights include a killing spree montage with a boss heavy metal soundtrack, a long monologue about the ineffectualness and decadence of the Roman Church, and a ten-minute sequence with a very fat woman running around naked. Lowlights include a very “politically incorrect” scene with a black prostitute. A real classic, but not as bloody as I might have liked. Seriously, no Papal torture scene? 4/5

The next Grindhouse Film Fest event is Saturday’s Demons and Demons 2 on Saturday. There are some surprise guests I know about and you don’t. But you would know if you had thrown down eight bills for Tuesday’s festivities, but I can assure you — it’s gonna be some epic shit. Buy your tickets in advance.

Upcoming Grindhouse Film Fest Attractions

"No More Wire Hangers!" Joan Crawford biopic camp classic from 1981

There’s a lot of cool stuff coming from the various and sundry Grindhouse Film Fests in the next week or so. Whether you’re in LA or Portland there’s a little something something going on.

New Beverly Cinema

Grindhouse Film Fest LA celebrates Duke Mitchell’s birthday with a double feature and special guests on May 10. Massacre Mafia Style and Gone With the Pope play at 7:30 and 9:30 respectively. GFF and the New Beverly Cinema will be hosting special guests Jeffrey Mitchell, Jim LoBianco and Matt Cimber for this event. This and all New Bev events are $7 for both movies and concessions are cheap.

Next on May 15 there’s a double feature of Demons and Demons II. For fans of supernatural euro-horror, this Lamberto Bava double feature will include surprise special guests. The first film starts at 9 p.m., with the second feature beginning at 11 p.m.

Finally on May 19 William Grafe graces Grindhouse Film Fest and the New Bev with his presence for a double bill. The Hooked Generation starts at 7:30 p.m., followed by Impulse at 9:30.

Hollywood Theatre

Portland readers fear not, I’m not abandoning you for my adopted home. Go down to the Hollywood for Dan Halstead’s monthly Grindhouse Film Fest. This month it’s Dr. Butcher (aka Zombie Holocaust). It’s apparently a more violent remake of Fulci’s masterpiece Zombi 2 from the land where intellectual property is a non-sequitor. The show starts at 7:30 p.m. on May 17th.

Mommy Dearest

Me and Mrs. Blues will be heading down to The Egyptian for Mommy Dearest tomorrow, a camp classic that has been a Deacon Blues favorite since as long as I can remember. I’ve never seen it on the big screen, but I can imagine the always engaging Faye Dunaway’s histrionic performance is even more sublimely operatic in 35mm.

David F. Friedman Film Festival

Scum of the Earth poster

One of the best parts of living in Los Angeles is being able to see things that I had hitherto only dreamed of; for example, yesterday’s David F. Friedman Film Festival at The New Beverly Theater. For $12 I got to sit through seven movies (ok, I only watched five) from the Dino De Laurentiis of the grindhouse.

My love affair with Mr. Friedman started in a similar place as many people my age. On the strength of an amazing title, a cool cover and previous positive experiences with the brand, I picked up Scum of the Earth. I was immediately sold by this classic tale of an innocent girl caught up in the smut racket.

Yesterday’s film festival was truly an event. It is a throwback to the days of the grindhouse when a low price for all-day admission was the norm. What the pussycat theaters of old didn’t offer was experts on hand to talk about the impresarios who made the sleaze possible. The New Bev was able to get several people close to Friedman, including Mike Vraney of Something Weird Video who informed the audience that Mr. Friedman was having the last laugh — we were still shelling out money for this shit.

The day began with Space-Thing. The print was rough, though I suspect that projectionist Adam Trash should be given a medal for making it as good as it was. This was probably the worst film of the festival, an amusing but unremarkable sexploitation film that has hints of The Thing, some passable boobs and a ridiculous non-plot. Two stars.

Next was Scum of the Earth chased with She-Freak. The former never disappoints. This is H.G. Lewis’ finest hour, a greasy picture filled with low lives, degenerates, petty criminals and massive domestic cars. The film is great, but didn’t gain a whole lot in 35mm. Read the previous Grindhouseland blurb on SOTE for more on this lurid gem. She-Freak, conversely, did seem to gain something in celluloid. The bleary, Sears-portrait like colors of the film are a perfect fit with the carnival’s popping colors and the subtleties of Claire Brennan‘s bitchiness come across far better when not confined to the small screen. Five out of five for this stunning remake of Tod Browning’s Freaks. Cool factoid: Ms. Brennan married little-person co-star Felix “Cousin Itt” Silla.

A Smell of Honey movie poster

After a short break we reconvened for A Smell of Honey, A Swallow of Brine. A brief overview for those unfamiliar: Girl gets almost raped. Girl cries rape on a bunch of people. Girl gets raped. Girl is hooking on the streets. Classic. Remember: “I may be a bitch, but I’ll never be a butch!” and nothing can beat that saucy eyebrow raise. Definitely worth seeing on the big screen and in the company of strangers. Four out of five stars.

I skipped Blood Feast. I’m not a huge gore fan and Mike Vraney can talk. I’m sure it was great, but talking to Mr. Vraney about Frankenhooker was better.

The Pick-Up is an often overlooked “roughie” gem. Two Vegas bag men get scammed by horny beat girls for a million of the mob’s money. The duo must resort to torture to locate the lost loot. A particularly chilling scene involves an electric cord, some tape, a pitcher of water and some poor woman’s nipples. Yikes. This was the true standout of the film festival. This movie isn’t quite the caliber of a Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!, but it’s not far of. I am now declaring that The Pick-Up is required viewing. Get to it, kids. Five out of five.

After that I went home, but apparently they showed Starlet, which I will now have to check out. Overall, the event was indicative of The New Beverly’s connections and reverence for under-appreciated areas of cinema. An overall atmosphere of respect and genuine interest was fostered, despite the audience’s awareness of the camp elements. A big thanks and kudos to everyone involved in making the festival.

May / End of April Flicks

David F. Friedman

I live in the capital of sleaze now and there are a number of ways to spend my time indulging in the culture of filth. The best part is that grindhouse doesn’t happen once a month in LA, it happens more on the order of once per week. Here’s a preview of some upcoming trash in Southland:

April 30 – David F. Friedman Film Festival – New Beverly Theater

The New Bev, owned by none other than QT himself, is hosting the David F. Friedman Film Festival TOMORROW. Twelve hours of Friedman. How much of a nerd are you? I’ll be there for the whole thing to take in classics like Scum of the Earth and She-Freak as they were meant to be seen.

Other New Beverly attractions of interest this month include a Dino De Laurentiis double feature (Flash Gordon and Conan the Barbarian on May 1 and 2) and midnight showings of Serial Mom (May 7th) and The People Under the Stairs (May 21). Seven bucks for a night out, including double features is a great price and concessions are always cheap as well.

The Egyptian

Not entirely within the purview of Grindhouseland, but the legendary Grauman’s Egyptian is showing Hitchcock films all month, including a 70mm print of Vertigo. Of particular interest to my loyal readers is the double feature of Two-Lane Blacktop and Ride in the Whirlwind. Check it out at The Egyptian on May 12.

Aero Theater

Tod Browning with the cast of Freaks

The Aero offers three nights of Todd Browning double features in May. On the 19th there’s The Unknown with The Unholy Three, two of Browning’s early silent films. There will be a live musical accompaniment to both films. The next day on the 20th you can see Dracula with Mark of the Vampire. The latter is a remake of Browning’s earlier lost film London After Midnight. Finally, on the 21st kick back for a double feature of Freaks (Gooba-Gabba!) and The Devil-Doll.

We’re Back…

If anyone is still out there in RSSfeedland, Grindhouseland is back. After a two-year hiatus, your favorite grindhouse / paracinema / drive-in / exploitation / tits and gore movie blog is back. Before the relaunch and reviews were tweaked. The next project is to update all the video links. I know that GHL htras been one of those lost blogs, floating in the aether for some time now, but I’m glad to bring it back.

You won’t be getting some insane number of updates daily, but I’ll be updating regularly. There’s a lot on Netflix to work through, plus I have relocated to the world capital of trash, Hollywood, California. In addition to reviews of things I watch in my apartment, you’ll also get listings of local events here in Los Angeles.

It’s good to be back and if there are any long-term readers out there, thanks for not deleting me from your RSS browser or periodically checking to see if I bothered to pick this thing up again. Special thanks to long-time GHL supporters Wes Unruh, Joseph Matheny, Danny Chaoflux and Justin Boland.

Trailer Wars, Part I

If you missed this month’s installment of Portland’s Grindhouse Film Fest series you didn’t just miss another month of kung fu fighting, dismembered bodies, and tales of bloody revenge. You missed the boys from the Alamo Drafthouse taking on local hero Dan Halstead in a battle of the trailers. If you weren’t there, fear not, Deacon Blues will be adding just as many as he can get his hot little hands on. When they’ve all been posted, I will show you the scores I gave each for their efforts. Without any further ado, I bring you, Trailer Wars, continuing all this week and starting with Team Grindhouse Portland!

Disco Godfather

Truck Turner

TNT Jackson

Sister Street Fighter

Blood Sucking Freaks

Three On A Meathook

Bloody Pit Of Horror

More tomorrow, kiddies. For those interested, the following films have bee reviewed on Grindhouseland:

Blood Sucking Freaks

Sister Street Fighter

Truck Turner

The Exorcist 2: The Heretic

However bad you think The Exorcist 2: The Heretic might be, you’re underestimating. The Exorcist 2, featuring Oscar-winning actors Louise Fletcher and Sir Richard Burton flanking the returning Linda Blair, is perhaps one of the worst sequels ever made. The degree to which the director staffs minor roles with Hollywood heavyweights (Max von Sydow, James Earl Jones, and the man who broke the creampie barrier in Hollywood, Ned Beatty) is testament to the desperation he must have felt working with the boring and convoluted script. Lots of heavy-handed dialogue between Burton (sweating gin through his makeup in virtually every scene) representing faith and Fletcher (looking rather Lincolnesque) representing science. Lots of lights being shined in Linda Blair’s face. Lots of Burton mumbling around the African desert. Not a lot of sense made.

“Don’t you ever want a woman, father?” “Yes.” Creepy.

2/5

Buy Exorcist II – The Heretic on DVD at Amazon!
Buy Exorcist II – The Heretic on VHS at Amazon!
Buy Exorcist II: The Heretic OST Soundtrack at Amazon!